How to Approach a Female Dominantwritten by Charles AKA closetsitter1 on fet life APPROACHING A FEM Domme I certainly don’t pretend to be a wise old sage or anything like that. In my years as both a submissive and my ventures into domination I have had the great fortune to serve many wonderful women. I have also been “professionally” associated with several Dominas throughout the southeast. I also know what caught my eye in a submissive's introduction, or what got them trashed right away. I offer this info as simple suggestions to help fellow submissive's in their quest. It won’t work every time and there is no “magic bullet” to make a Domme notice your letter above others. But just maybe, some of these things might help.
2 Unless the lady has specifically said to send her a list of your wants/likes/needs, DON’T do it! It makes you sound like you are telling her what you expect from her. Guess what Philby, she is a Domme because it is all about HER. Chances are she is going to use your likes to properly train you, but don’t send a grocery list of things you WANT. Remember, you are supposed to be here to make HER fantasies come true. To behave how SHE wants you too behave. If you list anything at all, only do so in generalities, like; “I have a strong taste for cuckold and humiliation.” Or, “I am a pain slut and would love to suffer for you.” An exception might be if you are into cross dressing or feminization. Some Mistresses are simply not into this and prefer their subs to be more “manly”. If you need feminization, it is probably best to mention this up front. It is also a good idea to mention if you are bisexual. Along the same line as feminization. Some ladies are simply not into this. No sense in wasting your time or hers. 3 DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE SEND A Domme A PICTURE OF YOUR DICK!!!!!! (A) She knows what a dick looks like. She didn’t become a Domme overnight you know. (B) Sending a picture of your dick says you think you have something special. Unless you can compete with the late John Holmes, you have nothing special. (C) Sending a picture of your dick (Take note I didn’t say cock. Bulls have cocks. You have a dick/dicky/wienie/or a fat clit at best.) says you want her to do something sexual for you. Wrong, wrong, wrong. You are here to serve her. (D) Sending a picture of your dick to a fem Domme is just plain insulting! It says your needs are purely sexual, she is a sex object. You don’t respect her. If you were trying to impress a woman who was interviewing you for a job, would you throw your dick out on the table in the middle of the interview? One more thing. I have seen guys send cock pictures to professed lesbians. Damn boy! Use the brain in the big head. 4 DO SEND A FACE PICTURE. Always! Yes, yes, I know in these politically correct times, it is not suppose to matter what you look like. Which do you want to do, be politically correct or on your knees in front of a Mistress? If you are young and built like Mr. America you might send a shirt off picture. But only if you meet that criteria. Look in the mirror and be honest with yourself before you try to impress a Domina with your physique. Some of these ladies will tell you EXACTLY what they think of your body. Besides, this is suppose to be about “service” to her. If she wants a lover, she may not want to mix slavery and sex. A face picture says “Here I am offering myself for your judgment.” And don’t send one taken twenty years ago! 5 Tell her what you bring to her. She is here to find someone who wants to be her slave or at least submissive and attentive to her. Tell her how you live to please. You want nothing more than to make her life an endless journey of pleasure. Tell her it would be an honor to serve her, a pleasure to suffer for her amusement. If you know how to give manicures and pedicures tell her. If you don’t know how, tell her you would be honored to learn for her. If you are going to be a submissive, get one thing in your head. You are here to serve HER. Make it known that you understand that in your introduction. 6 Proof read. Little says worse about you than sending misspelled words, poor grammar, and incoherent ramblings in a letter of introduction. She is sitting there looking at a totally screwed up letter and thinking, “Do I want to let this dumbass in my house?” 7 BE HONEST I cannot stress this enough. If you have a
gut, say so! If you are bald, say so! Don’t say you have “No Limits” unless you
really do have “No Limits”. Believe me, some of these ladies will find out quick
and at your expense, whether you are really a no limit slave. If you are
married, say so! (I know, I know, saying you are married is like saying you have
leprosy, aids, the clap, and projectile diarrhea all rolled into one, but the
lady deserves to know. You can’t be a slave and have secrets from your
Mistress.) Don’t offer full time if you know you cannot provide full time. 9 Don’t flood her with details. If you have been a slave to your ex-wife, say, “I have experienced 24/7 with a former Mistress.” Don’t send her the details of your 8 year marriage and your subsequent divorce., and the efforts you have made since then, finding another Mistress. Now I know I said no one liners, but you don’t want to send a ten page introduction either. One page, tops. Anyone can scan one page in just a moment and at least make a preliminary decision if they want to go further. 10 Don’t be afraid to send a second intro. Use a header like, “Just to let you know I am serious in my need to serve. Not to annoy you.” If she checks out your second intro, she may see something that didn’t catch her eye before. Maybe she dumped the guy she picked the first time. Maybe the sun is shining today. Who knows what makes women tick? But some pursuit and courting is “always” a good thing. Brilliant men have been trying to figure this game out for 50,000 years. What chance does a mere sub have? Think of your introduction as a resume. You want to accentuate your positives in a brief but concise synopsis. State your intention. Show your experience. Give your qualifications. Show her she will not be sorry if she gives you this opportunity. And this is for the real subs. Not the wanker/wannabes. Don’t get discouraged. Fem Dommes are flooded with responses every time they put an ad out. Hundreds sometimes. She may simply take a while to get to yours. You may just not be what she seeks. I know you would at least appreciate a “No thanks” response from her, but don’t look for it. Some will go out of their way to be polite, even to dork one liners. But most are too busy and just have too many men after them to answer every one even if they wanted to. 11. READ THE DAMN PROFILE!! So many subs do not read the entire profile or ignore what the lady actually says she wants. Can’t guarantee a thing. But this has worked for me more than once. Good luck! |